Liberty my Love

Last summer was a HOT one. Especially when you have added on an additional 35lbs. Especially when you move down from the mountains where it is a bit more chilly. Especially when you are anti-AC.

I kept calling my friend Molly to complain. She kept saying, use your AC.

Chris' solution to beat the heat was to play with the shades and windows. He calculated the times of days when it was beneficial to have the windows open. Which shades should be drawn at what time of day. He knew when to turn the swamp cooler on so that it would draw in cool air instead of hot. It seemed to work.

My way to beat the heat was to open all windows and the back door to "get a cross breeze" and to sit in my underwear on the couch waiting for Chris to get home and take care of all window shenanigans. My way didn't seem to work.

My way did invite all the flies from Colorado and its nearby states into our home. I felt like a sweltering cow and wished very badly that I had a tail to swat them with. Every night as Chris went around the house telling me how I am actually making the house hotter my job was to chase down the flies with the electric fly swatter. At no other time will I ever be as happy to smell burning insects as I was last summer.

Beyond the flies, last summer was the summer for mosquitos. I was bitten from head to toe. At one point I counted over 20 bites on my legs alone. With each bite my confidence in the fact I had West Nile was hightened. When Chris and I would take the dogs out on our walks I would dress myself in sweatpants, a sweatshirt (with a hood!) and cover my hands and feet (I could only fit my swollen feet into flip flops) with DEET. With each application of DEET my confidence in the fact that I was going to deform our unborn baby was strengthened. It wasn't until we went to a friends house for dinner that I learned of the miracle machine.

She said we were going to eat outside so I went to grab my sweatshirt with my hood damning myself for wearing a skirt and providing a feast of leg for the flying monsters. She started laughing asking why I was going to winterize for the summer evening. I looked at her like she was nutso. Maybe she could handle looking like she had measles, but I had a baby to protect from the diseased insects. I told her about the dangers of mosquitos and she simply pointed across the yard at this machine. It was huge, had a propane tank, and made it where they could spend EVERY evening outside with not one bite. It killed thousands. I was in love.

Last Sunday Chris and I took a lovely drive up to the mountains and purchased our very own death trap. It will lure mosquitos in by mimicking human breath, than vacuum them in and dehydrate their little blood filled bodies till they are dead. It is called the Liberty by Mosquito Magnet.

I have pictures of summer barBQ's at dusk spent on our back patio dancing in my head. Austin will be toddling around, wrestling with the dogs. Friends and family will be enjoying a bottle of wine (or three) and thousands of mosquitos will be dying by the second. It will all be perfect as the night air will surely be cooler than our house.