My husband the mechanic

We are driving down the street and I am telling Chris how I am sure my car is going to break down again. Most likely on our way to the hospital or bringing the baby home. He is asking why and I am telling him how my car pees on my foot and that can't be a good sign, and sometimes when I turn left it sounds like a bunch of paper is sliding across the dash board. In fact, the day before my ECM went out and I was stuck on the side of the road, the car had peed on my foot. I am saying all of this very scientifically because I am 100% positive that that means the ECM will stop working again.

Chris: Why?

I go on to explain like I am talking to a child that with the research I have done this means that the A/C either has a faulty hose and is leaking on the ECM or that the IAVC is faulty and causing coolant to leak onto the ECM. Because I don't know really what any of this means, I can only repeat random information I have obtained from my best friend Google.

Chris is silent and trying to make sense of all my reasons. I tell him to make a couple of "good hard turns" and he'll see what I'm talking about. Sure enough, the car pees on his foot, and then on mine again for good measure. Then the A/C starts squealing when we turn left.

Me: Did your mechanical engineering degree make it so you could be a mechanic?

Chris: Sort of, if I had wanted to, why?

Me: Well...you just don't seem to know very much. I mean, I'm the one who has figured out the ECM, the A/C, and the IAVC. You don't even know what IAVC stands for.

Chris: Shakes his head and laughs.

We get home and Chris starts to take the dash apart to see where this water could be coming from. I help by sitting in the front seat and watching and listening to how the A/C works. Then I help by coming inside to do more research on the computer (and look for new cars). He comes in 5 minutes later and is dripping, laughing, telling me to come look at his mechanical skills.

Turns out he found the drain for the condensate which had become obstructed by a metal shield. He uncovered it and now we have a pool of condensation on our garage floor. I'm not kidding, we could get in our suits and go swimming. He is guessing that the condensation has been building up for some time and when it dumps into the car instead of out the drain like it should, it was spilling on the ECM and caused an electric short.

I guess he is a good mechanic, as long as he has my diagnostic knowledge to help out.